Blocked Inspiration....

your loss of words
inspire a string of my own
dancing thoughts
and emotions
spilling down in drones
of unidentified objects
of the unknown

prompting mental relapses
that find solace on blank slates
of immobile forces
redefining a foreseeable
falsified fate
of connection

this lack of direction
down a page
begging for memories
and metaphors
fills my head
in high definition
with memories of every image
I've ever ignored

so I now find unidentified words
rolling back onto my tongue
and creating memories

of words I’d once written
on pages yet to come....

all inspired by the block you bare
this blank slate
this barrier
these boundaries
have become the very experience
fueling the inspiration
you are

and will forever be destined

to share

try me...then free me...but don't expect anything

paint me inside your extravagant expectation
and leave me there to dry
wait for me to bring you joy
then watch how i die

don't take your eyes off of me
while i lay on your canvas silent and still
and let your eyes erase my movement
my being
every ounce of life, logic
and free will

arrange your decorations
around this masterpiece you think you see
wait for a vision, some sign of light
some sort of clarity
that beams into your eyes a silhouette
of someone that looks nothing like me

these expectations can make traditions
run through your heart and viens
up your spine
till it wraps around your mind
till it wraps around your words
feelings
and perceptions
covering your eyes till they're blind

you can cradle this expectation of me
hold it close and wrap it tight
provide it light
and let it manifest and grow
into a concept
a prospect
of false identity
something i could never know

expectations i've built for myself
seem to be no match for the ones you've constructed
from your own experienced building blocks
and you let them close in on me
like windowless walls
and mismatched keys to mismatching locks

which means you'll never know who
i was truly meant to be
you'll never see
through the eyes of the Earth
through the only eyes that truly know me

i can only ever know truth in my own heart
be open to those images and ideas
i don't understand
and be patient with unforgiving eyes
closed hearts
minds
and hands

so know me or not
but don't pretend you think you know what you see
the only way to free yourself of your own unrealistic
unattainable
expectations
is by allowing me to be free

I am

I am not a gender
this curly hair or the clothes on my back
I am not a question or an answer
I am no cause for attack

I am not my 9 to 5
or the dreams in my head
I am not the words that I write
I am not the words I’ve read

I am not a relationship
a friendship or a lover
I am not a question or an answer
or some deeper meaning to uncover

I am not the shoes on my feet
I am not a walk or a glance
I am not a one night stand
or a never ending romance

I am not a size or height
I am not emotion or feeling
I am not attention or disregard
humility or healing

I am not justification
rationality or reason
I am not a wavering opinion
that changes with the season

I am….very simply
life moving through fingers and toes
a force
an energy pulling each of us closer
to that which no one knows

I am predetermined time
giving this body breath
the staggering infinite motion of life
the inevitable stillness of death

I am life
nothing more
I am life discovering my joy
as it is written in the Earth’s core

you and I are one in the same
life and energy seeking to understand
what happiness means to us
according to natures plan

I am life…
I am life….
I am….